I was born in 1959 and have always been pleased that I was a fifties baby even if it was only just! I was brought up in a very loving household with a Mother who talked about anything and everything to me and a Father who encouraged my love of sport teaching me to kick a ball as soon as I could walk! I had an older brother of 10 yrs and an older sister of 18 years when I emerged into this World.

As a matter of course in those days, I was sent to Sunday School at the local Baptist church and found that I thoroughly enjoyed learning about Jesus and especially singing the songs with actions!

At the tender age of 11 I went on a youth weekend with the church and found myself drawn to all that was shared about being a new person in Christ. So unbeknown to the others I went to talk to someone about it and ended up giving my life to Jesus even though I don't think I really understood what it meant. When I got home I explained what had happened to me and my Mother flipped insisting that I should never commit myself to anything like that in case I had to become a nun! I think the lines of communication didn't work too well that day, being a nun was the last thing on my mind.

As time went on I continued to go to church and the youth group, and didn't realise that some friends at school were praying for me. Many of my sporting chums were Christians and I spent a lot of time with them as sport was my hobby and passion. During this time I also had my first sexual encounter with another school friend and as you can imagine my life was in turmoil because of the feelings of love and the feelings of guilt all mixed into one.

Everything I'd ever read about the Bible had always told me clearly that you could not be gay and a Christian. So, after recommitting myself to God when a Youth Evangelist came to speak to the young people of the church, I accepted what I'd been told, asked God to forgive me and my "perversion" and moved on, dumping my girlfriend for Christ, believing that this was the end of my desires and that it was just a phase.

After my A-levels I went to PE College in Dartford (all female) and became involved in the Christian Union there. To play sport all day and learn about it as well was the answer to my dreams. I quickly made some good friends and was so open about my faith that I became well known for praying for others and within the first term had converted a friend. Good start you might think but I realised that I was being drawn towards others there in other ways than spiritual! So what did I do? I panicked, shot off to see my pastor immediately and asked for healing for this awful sin.

I was exorcised many times, told to dress in a feminine way and that now everything would be OK. Of course it wasn't. Whilst ending my time at PE College, I had another intimate relationship and managed to convert her to Christianity as well so you can see that I could not keep Christ or my sexuality out of my life. The two were as natural for me as walking down the street.

This scenario continued well into my twenties when I then found a church that really suited me. Why? Because I had yet again "sinned" as I was told, and needed to throw myself into working for God so that I would never again be tempted! God was calling to me very loudly to understand, but I was not asking God to guide me instead I was listening to the blinded views of others.

At 30 I believed that God was calling me into ministry but what sort I did not know. So after an emotional response at Spring Harvest, and after giving up my teaching job and my flat, I went off to London Bible College to study God's Word. I went through a phase of desperately wanting to get married but realising that I just wasn't attracted to men in a sexual way. Then as if I needed a rug pulled beneath my feet ever again, I was taught to question the Bible that I had been taught to obey. LBC were actually teaching me to delve into what the Bible really meant. My theology was blown apart and so was everything else I'd ever thought and believed. At the time it was scary but now I realise that it was the best thing that could have happened to me.

At the end of my first year there, I began to get to know Elaine as a close friend. We shared a lot and prayed a lot encouraging one another. She was married with two children and I was single with a great passion for God. We were both in the same church but had not really spoken very much although whenever we did get together, we laughed so much always at the same things. Over several months we fell in love and shared our past experiences of our sexuality. Elaine had struggled with her sexuality as much as I had but she had decided to marry to resist the attraction to other women, and I had gone to Bible college! Her marriage had been falling apart since the start and she had wanted to move on for many years.

After much gossip and speculation, we were thrown out of our church and felt that the only way forward was to live together with the two children (aged 8 and 11 at the time). So that's what we did but we were still believing what others told us: if we were Christians then we could not be in a sexual relationship together. So our response was to walk away from God - notice God never walked away from us, we walked away from God. Elaine even had a vision of herself walking away from God but she thought it meant that God had turned away from her.

Two years down the line I was desperate for a blessing as God was so much a part of me, that I couldn't let go completely. We were both saddened by the fact that we felt God wouldn't listen if we prayed, so we didn't and the void in our life was so vast that we didn't think there was any way to cross it. I called the Lesbian and Gay London Help-line and they gave me the name of a minister and church in north London who did blessings. We were very dubious when told that there was a church in London that was for the gay community mainly but after some encouragement we decided to go. What we found was to change our lives forever.

We found ourselves at North London MCC with a large number of other Christians who were also GLBT. But how come they were worshipping freely and we were stuck in this box? As the service went on we began to understand (although it took many years to get the feeling of guilt out of our systems because we had been "brainwashed" to believe we could not have a relationship with God), that people could be gay and Christian.

After six months there we had our friendship with God back on track and we were able to pray together again. It was so refreshing and as if God was pouring the Holy Spirit on us to tell us how glad Our Lord was to have us back. We experienced a freedom that we had never had before - not only in our Christian lives but in our daily lives as well. Now that we knew God loved us we could once again love ourselves and enjoy life.

Our blessing was in 1996 and after this time God began again to knock on the strings of my heart and remind me that I had a calling. Although I knew what it might be, it took others sharing with me completely out of the blue, that God was calling me into ministry with MCC - to be a vicar! (At least it wasn't the nun that Mum thought I would turn to be, but it still shocked her a bit.) At last I had to listen.

Things had begun to move and more training specifically for MCC, was in place. Elaine often reacted in disbelief when I used to say that I felt God was calling me to Brighton. There was no way either of us could see how this could possibly happen, particularly when there was an MCC already in Brighton that we knew nothing about.

In the Summer of 1997 we had a shock when my Father died quite tragically leaving my Mother very alone and insecure in Worthing. Unbeknown to me, by December of that year, Elaine had been led by God to suggest that the whole family (Laura was the only one at home at that time) move to Worthing. We had only ever considered retiring to Worthing and we certainly were no where near that age yet! We both had good jobs and Laura had good friends - there was no need for a move unless it was what God wanted.

To see if it was, we put our house on the market. It sold within a week but we could not move for another six months when our work contracts finished. The buyers had no hesitation - they would wait! God made it very clear that this move was not only of the Holy Spirit but also necessary if I was to fulfil my calling. Brighton was still on my mind but the week we moved to Worthing in July 1998, Brighton MCC closed. Things did not look too promising.

I didn't let go of where I felt God wanted me to be, and after completing all the courses (some residential, some correspondence), and after attending Bournemouth MCC each week for practical training, my final project towards the end of 2001 was to set up an MCC in Brighton. Contacts were made and in the January of 2002, a group of seven started to meet for planning.

A venue was found in the heart of the Brighton Gay Village that was affordable and that felt like a church due to a large glass cross in the front wall of the building, the time was booked and a date set.

Since that May in 2002, a lot has happened. I was ordained in December in Brighton MCC church with many friends and relatives in attendance. Brighton MCC (known as Brightwaves at first until it could sustain itself as an MCC in its own right), became a real MCC with a real vicar, a real Board and real members. Within 12 months of opening, it had grown from seven to thirty-seven and clearly God's Holy Spirit is at work within the heart of each person. My partner, Mother and daughter are all part of Brighton MCC showing that God works in all hearts in God's own time and as only God can.

I have a vision for Brighton MCC which has already begun. I have learnt that it is only people that can limit God's Spirit because I have learnt that in reality, God's love for humanity is limitless and God has made each of us in a unique way to celebrate the diversity of all that God has made and therefore all that God is (providing you believe that we are all made in the image of God that is!)

My story will continue, I hope, but I pray that it will be one of freedom in Christ rather than of guilt; one of openness rather than one of shame; and in particular, one of challenge and acceptance within God's Realm rather than one of blame and embarrassment for all that God made me to be.